Paddles and Hammers


My garage has a certain ungarageness to it. We haven’t parked a car in it for over seven years. Half of the garage is a boathouse, the other half is a blacksmith’s smithy.

Yesterday was spent largely mucking out the garage.  In keeping with my recent purging behavior (Goodwill loved me last week), I’m tossing a lot of junk into the giant city-issued trash can.  The larger, more valuable stuff that would be of little interest to Goodwill goes on the curb.  It’s often gone in a matter of minutes.  Yesterday an old Workmate was snapped up in 45 minutes, about 25 minutes more than I expected.

I’ve been blacksmithing for about a decade now, and it is now as much a part of my life as paddling. I certainly can’t be faulted for not getting my recommended daily allowance of iron. I’ve thought a lot about why I am drawn to elemental activities — air, fire, water, and earth. Water is easy to explain. Fire, air and earth combined to create a rich experience.

Blacksmithing and canoeing have a lot of similarities. They are inherently simple activities with subtleties that can take years to master. With all the jigs and tools I use in forging, my hammers are the most valuable tool to me. My hammers have personalities and quirks all their own. The hammer is the most important tool in working with iron.

I own approximately two dozen canoe paddles. I just counted sixteen in the garage, physically verified by touching the top grip of each one as I moved down my rack. There are two hanging on the wall in my living room: functional paddles I choose not to use because of their historical or sentimental value. I’m sure that there are another half-dozen in my office, stashed behind the comfy chair in my office. Then there are few floating around out there…loaned to friends or temporarily forgotten in the back of the car.

The paddle, I believe, is as important to one’s paddling experience as the canoe. Like a hammer to a blacksmith or a fly rod to an angler, it’s your primary tool to connect. It doesn’t matter how nice the canoe might be; if the paddle is garbage, your experience will reflect your choice. A bad hammer is worthless, except if you want to beat it into a really bad tomahawk for a neighbor kid. For the record, the kid told his mom and she was cool with it.

So when non-paddlers see my rack of paddles, they always ask the same question: “Why do you need so many paddles?” My response is always the same: “Why do you need so many shoes?” You wouldn’t go hiking in ballet slippers, and you probably wouldn’t run in hiking boots or dance in Bean boots. They all have their function, and so do my paddles.

I love my traditional paddles. They’re mostly cherry, a Canadian bias: they use cherry up north, we Yankees lean towards ash. Not that I don’t have ash traditionals, I have a few, plus a quilted maple, a birdseye maple, and a sassafras. They all are frequently used, and the ones I use the most are on their third of fourth coat of spar varnish. Their handles are polished smooth, not varnished but oiled, and my hand did the polishing over countless miles. When the water is deep, I lean toward traditionals.

I love my bent-shaft carbon paddles. At 13 ounces, they’re almost too light (as if anything could be) and their stiffness transmits power to the water like a Porsche transmission. Their blades slice quietly into the water and emerge with barely a sound. My cadence is high and the canoe accelerates quickly. It’s wonderful to race with a couple of light bent-shaft paddles.

I love my whitewater paddles. They’re beefy, almost clumsy-looking, and when hung on the rack with the other paddles, they look like a bulldogs in a kennel of greyhounds. But like a bulldog, they’re built for strength, not speed. Layers of fiberglass over thick wood blades inspire confidence, and you need not fear breaking one as you race down a Class II or III rapid. They sometimes seem to enjoy the carnage.

There’s my custom-made Quimby, a large-bladed freestyle paddle that is a work of art. Built by Craig Quimby in Mellen, Wisconsin, it will always be mine since it was tailored for me, and unless someone has very similar anthropometrics, it won’t be optimal. There’s my Black Widow, which was the fruit of a collaboration between Rutabaga and Bending Branches. It’s my favorite straight-shaft paddle you can buy off the shelf.

The list could go on, but there’s no need.

Then there’s the collection of paddles I’ve rescued from the edge of death, paddles that were destined for the dumpster. What a spokeshave, sandpaper, varnish and epoxy can do is almost miraculous. My kids’ first paddles were such rescues. Starting with a big paddle with a split blade and work it down to the good wood will guarantee a fine kid’s paddle that’ll outlast two or three kids. I’ve passed along dozens of these rescues to friends and family, and it’s fun to make something from what could have rotted in a landfill.

I’m sure some of you have your special paddles and feel a special connection to them. It might seem strange to folks who don’t paddle, but if you have one (or twenty) special paddles, allow to most emphatically validate your feelings of affection. It’s a canoe thing. If you get it, there’s no need to explain. If you don’t, no amount of explanation is sufficient.
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addicted to slow


I was a guest blogger for the Outdoor Retailer website.  This is what emerged from a sleep-deprived early morning stream of semi-consciousness.

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“Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel across the country from coast to coast without seeing anything.” – Charles Kuralt.

Every two or three years I like to drive the 1305 miles from my home in Wisconsin to Outdoor Retailer. I haven’t taken the long Ribbon of Boredom (a.k.a. Interstate 80) for years.

Son 1.0 is 17, and this is probably the last summer I know I’ll have him at home.  We did the Epic Guy Trip five years ago, and it was time for another.  Instead of taking the northern route, we decided to go south.  Two days of driving, and we’re halfway through Kansas. We have two more days to get to Salt Lake.  I really hope we make it.

I’m writing from a clean but cheap motel, greedily sucking down Wifi and charging every cell phone and camera battery I have.  The boy is still asleep: it’s 5:45 AM somewhere, I’m not sure what time zone I’m in, not that it matters much.

We’ve seen a lot already on this trip.  We’ve managed to eat only at locally-owned, owner-operated restaurants, another benefit of not taking Flatline Highway.  We’ve seen the world’s largest ball of twine, random English phone booths in front of a hardware store, and a swarm of dragonflies bird-dogging mosquitoes above a prairie cemetery.  We’ve eaten huge meals that cost $13.00 for two hungry adults and left $7.00 tips, always much appreciated.  We’ve seen the Barb Wire Museum, the original American Gothic house Grant Wood used as his model (modern version attached), the Golden Dome of Pure Knowledge, and the Johnson County Fair.  All because we took the roads less traveled; sometimes the roads not traveled at all.  I’ve found fuel without ethanol, which means I’m getting really good gas mileage.

The time in the truck with Son 1.0 is precious.  He still likes to be around me, for which I am unspeakably grateful.  Even better, he likes to sing Gilbert and Sullivan at the top of his lungs.  Yesterday we got through Mikado, especially enjoying the duets.  Dang, the kid has good pitch, and can do patter songs.  Impressive.  We listened to the music from Star Trek.  We sang Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog (he sang Dr. Horrible, I sang Captain Hammer – you do need to see this if you haven’t).  When we got tired of singing, we listened to old radio shows of Gunsmoke on my iPod.

I have no idea where we’re going today.  Son 1.0 expressed interest in Canyon de Chelly. I’m thinking that’s a great idea, but it would be a tough stretch to get there without violating the No Interstate Rule, so we may settle for some southern Utah stuff instead.

Did I mention I have no idea where we’re going today?

Starting Monday morning at 7:00 AM, I have a solid block of time scheduled until Friday at 9:00 PM.  I’m not exaggerating.  My life, once I hit the quarter mile radius around the Salt Palace, is planned for a week.  The contrast to my life today couldn’t be more striking to me.  It comes home easily when I look at my Google calendar for next week and it looks like a Piet Mondrian painting.  This week, it looks like a template for a calendar…nothing on it but the automatic weekly appointments I didn’t erase but could have.

It’s a nice way to start a work week.  The freedom of driving around such beautiful places at 55 mph is addicting — it’s the opposite of meth.  I’m becoming addicted to slow.  Not sloth, just slow, methodical semi-directional movement.  The only rule of navigation is to make sure we’re sorta heading west-ish.  Ironically, my brain has been more active as a by-product of slow.

The closer I get to Utah, the more I anticipate the family reunion that is Outdoor Retailer.  I am a blessed man today.  I get to sing Pirates of Penzance (I am the Pirate King) with my boy while driving to see my family.

Respectfully submitted,

Canoelover

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On appearing to be what you’re not


“Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men’s bones, and of all uncleanness.” – Jesus

Looks like a bee, flies like a…well…a fly.

Batesian mimicry is an awesome biological phenomenon, wherein harmless species (flies) take upon themselves the look at feel of harmful species so that predators are either momentarily or permanently confused.  Makes sense.  Look the part, play the part, reap the benefits of looking tough when a stinger is the last thing on your mind.

This little dude is perplexing me.  He has the body shape of a Drone Fly but his coloring is much brighter.  He certainly screams “bee.”  But he’s about 6mm long, that’s it.  As I said, little dude.

Recently I’ve had the misfortune of interacting with some people who aren’t what they seem to be.  I’m old enough to recognize a sociopath when I see one, that’s for sure. I trust in Karma and don’t worry about it too much. Life’s too short.

A fly isn’t being intentionally deceptive…that’s what happens when evolution renders black and yellow coloring an adaptive trait for a harmless fly.  But humans…aye, there’s the rub.

Whether it’s an Fundamentalist Christian Congressman from Indiana who promotes abstinence-only sex ed while doing the horizontal mambo with one of his aides for over a year, or a paddlesport publisher who says nice things to his advertisers but spreads lies and vitriol on the backside, it’s getting pretty thick out there.

That was a long sentence. Sorry.

What I think it boils down to is integrity.  Integrity is from the Latin for whole or complete. A person who is integrated has one persona, one face they show to the world.  There’s no Church Face, Work Face, Wife Face, Mistress Face, Children Face.  There’s just one face.

When I think of that sort of integrated soul, I often think of the Dalai Lama.

He visited Madison a few weeks ago.  Here he is wearing a Badger cap given to him by the Madison Children’s Choir.  Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama is an integrated man.  So was Gandhi.  So was Mother Teresa. In my own religious tradition, I think of men like Spencer W. Kimball, a Mormon prophet who always looked for ways to bless those around him.

There’s a story about Brother Spencer that I always loved, told by his son from a letter he had received from a stranger.

“A young mother on an overnight flight with a two-year-old daughter was stranded by bad weather in Chicago airport without food or clean clothing for the child and without money. She was … pregnant and threatened with miscarriage, so she was under doctor’s instructions not to carry the child unless it was essential. Hour after hour she stood in one line after another, trying to get a flight to Michigan. The terminal was noisy, full of tired, frustrated, grumpy passengers, and she heard critical references to her crying child and to her sliding her child along the floor with her foot as the line moved forward. No one offered to help with the soaked, hungry, exhausted child.

Then, the woman later reported, ‘someone came towards us and with a kindly smile said, “Is there something I could do to help you?” With a grateful sigh I accepted his offer. He lifted my sobbing little daughter from the cold floor and lovingly held her to him while he patted her gently on the back. He asked if she could chew a piece of gum. When she was settled down, he carried her with him and said something kindly to the others in the line ahead of me, about how I needed their help. They seemed to agree and then he went up to the ticket counter [at the front of the line] and made arrangements with the clerk for me to be put on a flight leaving shortly. He walked with us to a bench, where we chatted a moment, until he was assured that I would be fine. He went on his way. About a week later I saw a picture of Spencer W. Kimball and recognized him as the stranger in the airport.

That’s what it’s all about.  Showing love where it is needed, not where it is convenient.  Because of that example from one of my heroes I try to help out in airports because there is always such a need for a little help with folks traveling with small children.  I used to do it, I know.  By the way, the people who gripe about babies crying on airplanes must have been spontaneously created as adults and never were two years old and hungry way past bedtime.

We need to be who we are, or better yet, be who we want to become.

For those who still feel a need to have multiple faces and sets of behavior, free yourselves from the exhaustive work of trying to keep track of who you are to whom.  If you’re a jerk, take it from me…all of us pretty much know you’re a jerk, and it would be so much easier if you’d just embrace it.

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Hypocrisy


Sometimes it’s hard to be a follower of Christ.

It’s actually not that hard in the sense of living the basic tenants…love one another, take care of each other, avoid hypocrisy, don’t be selfish, judge not that ye be not judged, etc.

Actually, that last one…tough sometimes.

In recent days quite a few fundamentalist self-proclaimed Christian politicians, who hold themselves up as moral standards to the world, have been caught with their pants down…quite literally.  How a congressman from Indiana can introduce and support legislation on his version of morality while sleeping with one of his aides (not an “oops, I made a mistake,” but an ongoing, living breathing lie) is beyond me.  I don’t get it.

Look, I am as human as the next man.  I don’t pretend to be a symbol of all that is good and righteous.  I have been married for 26 years, and so far, I have been faithful to my wife.  I say so far not because I intend to be unfaithful, but because the moment I think I’m immune to infidelity is the moment I am vulnerable.  But I am not immune.  I will never be immune.  No one is.  No one.

What does this have to do with being a Canoelover?  Bear with me.

When Mark Souter delivered his mea culpa speech, I was sickened. I am deeply sorry.  Etc. Not as sorry as his wife, his kids, his grandkids.

Souter, a devout Christian, forgot that love one another doesn’t mean sleeping with an aide.  Souter is also a promoter of abstinence only sex education.  Abstain this, Mark.  )Ironically, that video is a discussion between his aide, Tracy Jackson, his alleged mistress.)

Ironically, I believe that abstinence before marriage and fidelity after marriage is a good thing.  I am also a realist and realize that it is not always the case.  I also believe that it’s a parental responsibility to teach morality, not a school teacher, and certainly not a hypocrite like Souter.  Souter, the man who was among the first to call for Larry Craig’s resignation.  No, really.

“In the poisonous environment of Washington, D.C., any personal failing is seized upon, often twisted, for political gain.”

How does one “twist” adultery?  I get it…the poisonous environment made him do it.

I have never been and will never be ashamed to be a follower of Jesus.  I love His words, who He was and what He stood for.  I love what He did for me and everyone else because He loved us.

I am, however, ashamed to be associated with people who wear their religion on their sleeve as a badge of honor while dishonoring everything they supposedly stand for.  One thing Jesus could not tolerate was hypocrisy.

“Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men’s bones, and of all uncleanness.”

So there ya go.  Rant over.

Today I am going paddling on the Sugar River.  It is one of my favorite places to paddle in the early season.  It’s beautiful and peaceful.  And it will have nothing to do with politicians, adulterous or otherwise.

And that’s one more reason I’m a canoelover.

Respectfully submitted,

Canoelover

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Rosie



This is my friend Rosie, the Rose Tarantula.

[OMGican’tbelievehehasatarantulaonhishand]
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Paddling The Northern Forest Canoe Trail


When I was invited to paddle the Northern Forest Canoe Trail with a group of writers, photographers and retailers (they considered me a triple threat), I had no idea what I was in for. I had seen pictures of the trail, the lakes and rivers that take a paddler from Old Forge, New York to Fort Kent, Maine, over 700 miles. What I hadn’t seen was The Balsams.

The first sign of trouble…

The Balsams is one of those grand hotels that dot the White Mountains in New Hampshire. A century ago they were the playgrounds of the upper-middle class, civilized places where a guy can bleed dollar bills, tipping anything with a pulse and a palm. It’s also a place that has a dress code.
Seeing a bunch of paddlers sitting down for dinner in a swanky dining room that has 100 year old stained glass is a unique experience. We all were wearing borrowed blazers (I got the last 46 long, other suffered with 40 shorts) and we all looked stupid. Well, mostly stupid. At least I wasn’t wearing Keen sandals.

At any rate, we skirted the dress code as well as we could and got on the river the next morning.

We started on the Magalloway River, near a picturesque covered bridge (Bennett Bridge). This is of course, redundant, as the raison d’etre for covered bridges is to be picturesque. Some are both picturesque and quaint. New England oozes quaint.
Note the floatilla of Wenonah Kevlar. Minnesota IIs and Champlains, light, quick and lots of fun to paddle. The Champlain was faster than I had imagined, and I hadn’t spent a lot of time in one, but it was fine and dandy. It also made the Minnesota II feel like a rocket ship when I climbed into it the next day. More on that later.

The Magalloway River is part of Section 8, Rangeley Lake to Umbagog. The NFCT has 15 sectional maps, and each is unique due to the local stewardship of both the trail and the map. Because the trail flows through four states plus Quebec, creating a sense of local ownership is critical. Each map has an historical primer on the back side, so it’s not just a map, it’s a mini tour guide.

Of course, there were odonates.
I hear groaning from some of you Nodonates. Please redirect yourself to this odonate-free zone.


For the second time in as many weeks, I found myself rescuing a dragonfly from a watery tomb. This lovely Canadian Darner (Aeshna canadensis) sat on my finger for a while and washed himself off. He tried to fly away but was too weak and landed in my lap, so I gave him a lift to Lake Umbagog.

The Magalloway ends at Lake Umbagog, a lovely lake with a very interesting habitat – a floating bog island. Yep, an island made of spaghnum and other mosses which is large enough to support live trees. You can walk on it, but it’s like walking on thin ice; you might drop into it if you hit a thin spot. Still, it’s unique enough to be listed as a National Natural Landmark. It is one of the largest floating island in the U.S.

When we got to our campsite on Umbagog, I scurried to the most remote location I could go without accusations of being antisocial. It was a few hundred feet from a nice Class III rapid so I had the ultimate white noise machine. Big Agnes supplied bags and tents, and I drew the solo tent (yay!), although I’ve seen sarcophagii with more room. Still, it kept out (most of) the no-see-ums.
After an amazing dinner of moose and bear (both excellent), I bedded down with nothing to read but my own thoughts. Being my thoughts, they put me to sleep quickly.
The next day we switched up boats and partners. I grabbed Dana Henry and said “Let’s motor.” We were in an empty Wenonah Minnesota II, a 41-pound rocket ship that has a hull speed of 7 miles per hour. We kept it there for quite a while, doing s-turns to allow the rest of the group to catch up.
I was stoked because I love paddling with people who are better than me and because I got to paddle bow. I never get to paddle bow. The view was great, and the ability to practice one thing only (forward stroke efficiency) was a zen-like experience. For once I was the motor and not the steering wheel, and I think I’m a pretty decent motor.

At lunch we switched to Royalex canoes for the river portion of the journey. The Androscoggin River is a series of riffles and flat stretches punctuated by some really nice Class II-III rapids. We switched up again and I paddled with Doug, a free-lance writer and a gem of a guy…thoughtful and smart, a radical in that he believes in Democracy and not a contrived oligarchy. Awesome dude.
After the big rapid I swapped the tandem for a solo Wenonah Rendezvous. I have gone on record stating that this is one ugly canoe from the waterline up, but from the waterline down, it is a sweet, sweet boat. Amazingly good at handling some big water, and dry as you would expect after a big wave. As the weather cooled and the water became glassy, I went for a paddle up a small unnamed creek. No moose, but a lot of beaver chew and the start of some nice little dams.

As the sky darkened I headed back to camp, and the colors (poorly captured by my stinky little point-and-shoot) were amazing. Jupiter popped into view first (Venus was hiding somewhere) and I stood away from the campfire for a good long time taking in the post-sunset.

Then we went surfing. More pictures to come when I can nail down the photographer (Brian) and beg and plead for a picture.
So much for a non-prosaic description of our trip. I’m saving the good stuff for Sierra Magazine, column to be published in the May-June issue 2010.
One thing I relearned; it’s all about the people. The folks who share your common experience are the main course, and the location of the trip is only the spice that flavors it. So thanks to David, Jim, Scot, Heather, Mike, Rob, Kay, Brian, Emily, Bill, Dana, Nemjo and Keith. You were the trip, the river was just a medium to share a wonderful experience.
Respectfully submitted,
Canoelover
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My nephew Vance



Vance is skipping kindergarten through 12th grade and going right to business school.  He would not leave my Blackberry alone.  I think he called his broker five or six times.

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Okay, I admit it…



…I need new cycling gloves.

And I’ll get some soon from my friends at Sugoi.  These, in fact.
These are Pearl Izumi.  They’re years old and owe me nothing.  Dunno, could have been that 60-grit handlebar tape I was using.  They did seem to lose their cush factor fairly quickly…oh well.  Live and learn.
Respectfully submitted,
 Canoelover
P.S.  That picture is sorta grim.  If you squint at it just right I look like a burn victim.
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"Things are seldom what they seem…"



So said Gilbert and Sullivan in HMS Pinafore. I took this picture a few years ago at Libby Flats, elevation about 11,000 feet, in the Snowy Range in Southern Wyoming. I’ve shown this picture to quite a few people and I get significant variance in responses — from cracked mud to modern art to some sort of landscape from an airplane.

It’s just a dead pine tree root that had been sandblasted by the ice and snow that blows with such ferocity at those altitudes. It’s a stark but beautiful place and I make it a point to visit whenever I drive through Wyoming. It gets me off the interstate and slows me down.

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INFJ



“INFJs are future oriented, and direct their insight and inspiration toward the understanding of themselves and thereby human nature. Their work mirrors their integrity, and it needs to reflect their inner ideals. Solitude and an opportunity to concentrate thoroughly on what counts most is important to them. INFJs prefer to quietly exert their influence. They have deeply felt compassion, and they desire harmony with others. INFJs understand the complexities existing within people and among them. They are at their best concentrating on their ideas, ideals, and inspirations.”

I’m sorry, but this sounds a lot like a horoscope.

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