adventures of a canoelover

Sometimes a boat is put away for the winter with a few cups of moisture in it, sealed up with a cockpit cover, and there ya go. Congratulations, you’ve just created a 55-gallon petri dish.

Even though we had a long, cold winter, there are some pretty amazing creatures that grow inside whitewater boats even through the deep freeze. I found out first hand when I opened the cockpit to air it out and make sure the outfitting was ready to go for the whitewater season. To quote Roseanne Rosannadana, “I thought I was gonna die.” What was growing in my boat could gag a billy goat with a bad head cold. It wasn’t the volume of creatures, it was the pungency.

Plugging my nose with a clothespin, I washed out the Hoss C1 and rinsed it with a mild bleach solution. Sure, I killed 99.44% of the little buggers, but my guess is that I’m only creating Supermold that will be able to dissolve and digest polyethylene and closed-cell foam, leaving only an empty husk.

I had a day off today. Mid-week days off are sorta sweet…you’re off everyone else’s 9-to-5 Mon-Fri schedule, so you can have a little more freedom than a Saturday.

I was going to work on building shelves in the basement, but given the glorious weather today, it would have been a crime. I will do that when it’s raining this fall. I decided instead to build some Leopold Benches.

Aldo Leopold designed these benches years ago, I have no idea when. They were made so that they could be build by almost anyone with a saw, drill, screwdriver and a crescent wrench. I cheated a little and used a power saw, power drill, and a palm sander to get the slivers off the wood. The outcome was satisfactory.

I recycled a bunch of wood from the shop, from racks were tore down to replace with Aquaracks. All I needed was three 10′ 2x8s. Everything else was cut out of pieces left over. The rest will be turned into kindling for next year’s fireplace.

I think if you had the right set-up and a few people, you could make these by the dozens. They’re deceptively comfortable, simple, and authentically rustic.

78%

Probably because I said I’d go back and try to save my friends and family rather than leaving them in the hands of the undead.

Gracie likes it.

Happy Birthday to meeeee….

I am officially middle-aged. Actually, I needed a base of operations for Quietwater Films when we are filming on location. So it’s a tax deduction and a fun machine.

So today I got to climb on the roof, as I needed to clean out some seriously nasty rain gutters, since they were completely non-functional and in bad shape.

While I was up there, I decided to take a look around and I saw a really cool view of the back lot leading out to the dock. Ignore the bass fisherman squatting (not literally) on our dock. It’s a pretty sight, all those kayaks all lined up waiting for SPRING.

I love cycling, always have since my first Schwinn Stingray (gold) with a sparkling vinyl banana seat and a sissy bar in back. I progressed through a series of different bicycles over the years, and now…I’ve come full circle.

I have been lusting after a Rivendell for years, but only hard-core cyclists (or trust funders who think they are) can afford a Rivendell. They are works of art, and are worth every penny, and maybe someday when I retire I’ll get one and ride across the U.S. or something like that.

In the meantime, I must go budget. That said, you can get a lot of bike for not a lot of money if you’re willing to give up a few things…like dérailleurs and freewheels and stuff like that.

The Schwinn Madison is a sweet, sweet ride. I got her last week, still in the box, and built her up Saturday night. I went for not one but two rides on Sunday, one with Stephanie and one without. Even out of shape and carrying ten pounds of winter lard, I still managed a 19 mph average speed for a nice 10-mile sprint around the lake. It made me feel really good…powering up those long hills without the benefit of lower gears…I dunno, it feels pure somehow.

The best part about a fixie is the quiet nature of the drive mechanism. No dérailleurs to purr and clank, no freewheel buzzing, nothing. Just smooth, direct, quiet power from my quivering, lactic-acid drenched legs. I can’t recommend then enough. I somehow think my old Bridgestone crossbike is going to be gathering more dust this Spring.

P.S. One more reason to love Rivendell: The Tips for Happy Riding.

Okay, so she’s not my niece…but I have sisters and brothers from different mothers, uncles and aunts that aren’t related to my parents, and at least one grandfather who isn’t. My definition of family is a little skewed toward inclusion.

Hailey, a charming 14-year old, is an up and coming slalom racer, talented and poised beyond her years. She certainly charmed the socks off me at Canoecopia. She was asking for a donation, but was unclear what she wanted or needed, so Uncle Darren took her under his wing and explained how this sponsored athlete thing works.

Athletes want gear and cash. Vendors want associations with exceptional athletes and beyond that, exceptional people. They want their product portrayed to the world in a good light, by people who not only win, but are good examples to the world of what it means to be a paddler. N.B. I have no idea why some whitewater paddlers are sponsored, given their off-river behavior. It’s often crude and usually shameful. Anyway…

Once Hailey and I had a list of what she wanted and needed, we started talking to different folks and found that most if not all were receptive to being associated with Hailey and her C-1, Nemo (notice the similarity). Lili from MTI/Palm was exceptionally impressed, as was Carol from Smartwool, Jim from Werner, Bruce from Sawyer Paddle, Michael from Kokatat, and a few other various and sundry vendors who helped get Hailey outfitted for this season.

Walking back to meet her parents, Hailey put her little arm around my waist, gave me a little sideways hug and said, “Uncle Darren, you’re brilliant.” Actually, Hailey is the brilliant one, training hard while maintaining a honor roll GPA and developing other skills as an artist.

In short, just the sort of person you’d want to have as a niece.

I dedicate this post to Kelly Blades. Ladies and Gentlemen, Akhmed the Dead Terrorist.